Self-Care Staycation

Other than Christmas break, when our company is closed, I haven't taken a week's vacation since 2013.  We've had a few mini trips and long weekends here and there but my last extended retreat was our beach trip as a family.  Five years ago.

When looking at the number of days I had available and realizing how long it has been since I've had a week's rest, I opted to take a staycation this week.

Spontaneous.  Last minute.  No plans or schedules.  Ten Whole Days Off!

I'm almost always off on Fridays, so actually, I guess my "vacation" has come to an end; however, I am most certainly still in a staycation state of mind.  And will be that way until Monday!

After having something to do, somewhere to go, or somewhat of a last-minute agenda every day so far, today was operation lazy PJ day.  And I thoroughly enjoyed it from my first cup of chocolate chai to Netflix binging and cuddling our new kitty to being completely ok with being non-productive an entire day.

In fact, if I've had any purpose at all for this past week, it has been to practice self-care.  In the moment, listening to what I want or need, and doing just that.  Or nothing at all.

So far...

I've jumped out of my comfort zone and into a dress celebrating the success I've had 

with changing my health for the better.  

AFTER I returned home,
I realized my tag was on my chest.  #backwardfail

Picked up more pumpkins and mums just because they make me smile.

Captured sweet moments at my little sister's wedding.

Held an impromptu sleepover with my nieces and nephew.

Napped whenever I wanted.

Kidnapped mom and took her on our annual "Nut Club Food Fest" adventure.

Enjoyed coffee & chai on the deck.

Self-improvement and continued learning.

Soaking up family time and everyday moments of JOY.

My staycation didn't include spas, sand or exotic locations but I wouldn't trade it for the world.  

And this girl is making it a point to take more "Me" days in my future. Because I'm worth it!

Fabulous Fall

Driving home just now, I became teary, lifting up prayers of gratitude.  The prayer was for nothing special or big but instead something quite simple.  Or rather, many things.

It's only past lunch but it has been a truly beautiful, wonderful fall day.  Everyday, normal moments I feel extremely blessed to have had.

the seasons are "kissing" as summer meets fall at the house

Watching my son bounce off happily to school, earlier than normal so he could get a good parking spot for "Fun Day."  

Morning coffee with my hubby.  

Running errands in the sunshine, taking in the changing trees and blue autumn skies.  

Sneaking in a treat of a pedicure...purple toes. 

 And...yellow mums!

Yes, I chuckled aloud as I thanked God for yellow mums.  But then, he is the One who created them.  And I kinda think He takes pleasure when we show gratitude in the little things.

More than anything, I like to imagine that He is filled with joy when we are - and we pause to also be thankful for the experience.  I know that when my children showed joy and gratitude in the moment, it always overflowed me with the same emotions.

And on the opposite side, when they whined and complained, I was clouded with a whole different set of feelings.  So I would guess God shares the same sentiment.  How often we grumble and moan about things that really aren't that big in perspective.  I'm sure we're all guilty of having those pity parties.

Yet I see families struggle weekly with troubles that would knock most people flat out and yet they still go on, with their head high, and those around them aren't even aware of what they face.  Many prayers are said for families like these, or those struggling with illness, loss.  My heart has also been tugged toward the south, watching the mighty destruction of Hurricane Matthew.  When you compare your issues to something of that magnitude, it really helps change your outlook.

In my experience, focusing on what you have to be thankful for always adds happiness.

We've had our share of sorrow, but we also have had seasons of singing and JOY.  And I'm ever-grateful for this glorious season I'm basking in today.

What are you thankful for in this moment?  I'd love to hear from you!

Grief to Thankfulness

During October I participated in a photo challenge.  30 days of capturing the grief of child loss. Though it is something I live with daily, it was fascinating to see it visually.  To focus on a topic and a picture to describe my feelings each day.  Purposefully, I didn't really look ahead or think about what I would write each day; instead, I lived in the moment.  Capturing photos from where I stood in the day.  Where grief found me at various points of the day.

Goosebump hug - "23"1 posts on this last day

As I looked back this morning through my collection, a collage of grief, 

something stood out.  

Healing.  Truth.  Joy.  Life.  

For so long, in the darkness of grief, 

I didn't know that any of those would ever exist again.  

Below is Day 29.

Day 29: Reflect #captureyourgrief
All day I've thought "how can I sum up the past six years of #childloss in an Instagram post?" Impossible.
But driving home I saw this tree and turned around to capture a photo. It spoke to me about grief.
Ugly/beautiful. Gradual. Slow, like that of the seasons. Change. Death and yet, life.
After taking it, I looked down and noticed the arrow. Moving forward. Looking ahead. Hope. #joy. And it's all a cycle. Yes, if a paragraph can sum it up this tree inspired that reflection... #whathealsyourheart

The project actually went through 31 days.  The final day we were to capture a sunset.  Day 31, Halloween, found me knee deep in trunks of candy.  Organized chaos.  The scent of chocolate.  An array of costumed kiddos.  And sleet.  Seriously, sub-zero temperatures and just as we began to set up - freezing rain!  We pushed through and, although very chilly, it was a beautiful night.  Even in the weather, over 700 kiddos came through within an hour and a half.

Needless to say, I didn't have an opportunity to capture a sunset.  (Or post for Faithful Friday.) Honestly, I don't know if a sunset was even visible.  But here are some photos of my last night of October.  A sweet ending.

A panoramic view of the start of the night - Trunk or Treat @ EHBC

Our trunk - Monopoly
and the cutest "Mr & Mrs Moneybags" ever!

Now...we are in November.  A bittersweet month.  

A month of memories, our lasts with Austin.  Remembering the pain, the nightmare.  But also, absorbing the gratitude.  A month of thankfulness.  

For what was... and what is...and what will be.

Still Standing: October

A month or so ago I received word that I'd been selected to be a monthly contributor for an online magazine, Still Standing.   What a bittersweet honor.  Such a blessing to be able to share our child loss journey, in hopes that it will help someone, but not a club I ever wanted to be a member of - or imagined I would be.

My First post was released this month and I wanted to share with all of you.  I won't always double post these but I know that many of you faithful readers are also members of this unwanted club.  My hope is that, if you haven't already, you'll find even more peace at Still Standing and will add it to your regular readings.

Sending you joyful wishes in the coming week.....

Octobertunities

Know why there's a smile on my face today?  Here's a hint...it begins with Oct and ends with ober.  One my most favorite months of the year!

Yellow mums...pumpkins (pies, lattes, candles, cookies, carving, painting, oh my word!)...caramel apples...autumn leaves...crisp mornings...bonfires...hayrides...scary movies...candy corn...soups, stews and chili...coffee on the deck, under a blanket...apple cider...Halloween parties...perfect hot tub weather...sweatshirts and hoodies...God's breathtaking landscape in the fall...

There's so many festivities and JOY I can hardly contain my excitement - or know where to begin.  I'm starting out the celebration with plans for a pumpkin spice latte to start my workday, free, thanks to the gift card won last month.  And, since my fall break vacations in five short days, I plan to dive in and enjoy every morsel October has to offer.  So many opportunities....so little time!

What's your favorite thing about October?