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January seemed so promising. A milestone year, as each of celebrated "big" birthdays. My one word for 2016 was chosen - Forward - with hopes and dreams of a record year.
Well...it has left it's mark.
For Tim and me, milestone birthdays just meant a big reality check of aging. More on that to come. But for Noah, turning 16 has been filled with changes, opportunity and possibilities. And for that, despite the hiccups that this year has brought, I'm thankful.
We've watched him hop from the nest and soar this year. It's bittersweet as your child grows. I'm proud of his independence but it isn't easy letting go. As he's closer to an adult than a child now, I find myself mentally counting the days he's left to nestle under my wing.
In less than a year, he's become a licensed driver and been accepted to college. How did that even happen?! I'm thrilled he already knows what he wants to do with his life and is so passionate about his future. For that, 2016 has most definitely been a record year for him.
Spring saw me with an extra bounce in my step, not just from the return of warmer weather but also because this 40 year old body moves much better without ice and snow. I welcomed the season with a trip to the mountains with my momma and restoration within my soul.
By summer, with half the year gone, I found myself grabbing hold of joy. Realizing that my focus was slipping, I pondered on what began this little blog and challenged myself to find joy every day. And record each moment. 31 days of Joy.
Perhaps it was because God knew I needed to store it up for the season that was coming.
Tim welcomed 50 with a surprise retreat. Though my dream was that somehow a free cruise or trip to the beach would have landed from the sky and whisked us away to celebrate, I was pretty proud with the mini vacation Noah and I pulled together. It was relaxing and everything that Tim loves.
And it was the respite we needed to prepare us for the storms ahead. Once Tim blew out that big 5-0 it was if someone flipped the switch on his health. My rock began to crumble. Without warning, we found ourselves in the ER for random pains and scares in October and health concerns would continue to be the theme for autumn.
As I write this post, he's off for the week recovering from a foot injury, though there wasn't an accident to cause it. None of his ailments have been serious but they've been enough to shake us. He's struggling with having to be still and not be the doer, providing for our family. For me, it hurts to watch him hurting. I'm worried about his current issues but also stewing on our future. We're so not prepared for aging, or the potential of either of us not working.
It's enough to have me concerned about the forward that it pulled me from the bed at 2 a.m. And I know that isn't at all the purpose God would have for me, when he sent that word twelve months ago.
Through 2016, He's helped me learn to let go. Now I must lean in and trust Him for whatever is to come...
